**LOVE STORY 2012**

Guys and girls this is going to be the shortest novel on the Earth and the crappiest one too. so read it, get it and yea you surely can hate it.The use of asterisk is explained in the last. But it is suggested to read them and the acknowledgement at last only.

                                                                      Prologue

                                                               

Hi! I am Natalie, I am 19, and yes before you start imagining your protagonist of this story that is me to be a perfect beautiful teen, then I am sorry, but for your disappointment I am not. I am not for sure, what you would love to dream off. I am a 5 “2” weighing 60 kg pale girl with pimple all over my invisible face, to cut it short, a very average looking girl to be polite. And ugly in truth, well that’s the ugly truth of my life. Maybe by now you have lost all the interest in reading me, but this is the exact point where I have got all the interest in writing me (unlucky you!).

Like all the teens, I too dream of a guy, an understanding guy in my life who will love me, care for me and be with me for the whole life. Oh! Please, don’t think of me to be one of those sassy teen who just think of a guy only. I dream to be a successful writer and filmmaker of horror movies too* (and Please don’t judge me with this novel too). But I do not want to write about my academic life and my struggle with it, because it will definitely not interest you (and me either). So I picked up something, which is so obvious being a teen to choose. Yes! You are right; I am talking about love only. It happened to me also but unlike all the fairy tales* I am the less fortunate to not get it in real life*. Because the truth is, no matter what you are, an intellectual, a philanthropist, a journalist, an actor or even a rickshaw puller, you always dream of a beautiful girl. Ugliness has no space in anyone’s life except the ugly person’s himself. A fat person is bullied, but an ugly person gets bitched about. People talk about you on your back, they make fun of you. Well, one more thing you can call me ‘scary movie’*, ‘fun cinema’ or the easiest one ‘ugly’ as my friends call me on my back (don’t know why on earth I call them ‘my friends’). I being a polite person never harmed anybody, never even intended to but still when I am around, suddenly people start whispering and talking about me and making fun of me. As In my absence I am never being talked about, am not worth being talked about.

                                                                      

Well, I will choose this Friday to start my story. It was Friday the 13^th*, the day I was walking to my college, en route I saw a guy walking parallel to me, sometimes ahead of me sometimes behind me. But I could see and feel him all around me like I have got four eyes, two on my face and two behind it*. He was* the kind of guy I always dreamt off. Tall, fair and handsome, he was the proud owner of hazel eyes and exclamation marks on his slim cheeks, oh god! He was fair like my blood*(don’t take any ideas am just talking about the WBCs).

                                                                      

 Anyways we walked to the college together (at least, I want to feel it like, we were “together”). To my happiness, he comes out to be my classmate moreover; he was sitting on the seat where I used to sit alone, the last bench. I felt like, I am the luckiest person on the earth and I wanted the moment to get freeze. But here it could not, coz it’s the mother earth, time passes away here like people*. Anyways I sat with him, and we talked too. His name was Helmond. He was a kind guy, he did not judge people on their looks, so he could not judge me either*. Unlike other guys in my class he was an all-rounder, he played basket-ball, he came 1^st in class and he was kind too. Soon all the girls started craving for him, not only of class but of the whole college. But the one with whom I was most jealous was, Armena. Coz I found her the perfect match for Helmond, not that she is kind, in fact she is a bitch but she was the sexiest girl in college, she was fair, tall, slim and has hazel eyes too.

                                                            

 She wanted to have Helmond, she wanted to snatch him from me (not that I had him), but I loved to feel that he is all mine. To my fear, one day I got to know that Armena is a psychopath and once she decides to get something she could do anything to get it, and if by chance she doesn’t she destroys that thing itself. And the crazy psychiatrist described it as “she wants to kill the cause of her pain; once it ends she becomes normal and again starts leading a happy life”. But I do not have any sympathy for her, I just feared her what if she does something bad to me or for that matter Helmond, as the whole college knew by then that I and Helmond have become great or better say best friends. I don’t know what Helmond felt for me, but I certainly was in true love with him and he didn’t know that.

                                                                 

Two months passed away anyhow and on the morning of a Saturday 14^th* I woke up all to hear the unbelievable news of Helmond’s death. Yes, he is no more. Helmond is no more. And I burst out in tears, I was crying but nobody could hear me*, I crawled to my bed and peeped through the window and saw Helmond was hanged to death in my lawn only, with his body straight. There was blood all over his body, it seemed like somebody had tried to scratch him or eat him, and his tongue was out of his mouth.

                                                               

 And after seeing my Helmond in this condition my heart sorry*, I started crying all over again but I knew I could not get him back. I had lost my True Love. I had lost him. The police came to me probing, interrogating about his death, they were clueless as I was, coz there were no fingerprints, footprints or any proof to find out the guilty, it was a murder of course, but it seemed like it was a murder with no murderer involved. I was puzzled. And suddenly I remembered Armena, and thought poor girl!! Even she doesn’t know who murdered Helmond let alone Police.

Coz only I know who murdered him…

                                                                                                                        . :-P :-D

want to know who am i? have a look..

                                             this is my favorite pic :D

                                                             Ain't bad...haan?

                                                                       EPILOGUE

I wanted to make horror movies coz this is my only genre.

Fairy tales never existed in my life..Oops! Sorry my death :-p

I never had a real life

People called me “scary movie” coz yea I am damn scary to humans

I saw Helmond on Friday the 13^th. My auspicious day

He soon became “was” that is why I never used present tense with him

I literally have four eyes; the other two are invisible coz of my hair

And yes I have a fair or white blood, even my RBC is WBC

Here in earth time passes quickly, but in my hell we can freeze time

Helmond was foolish to not even get scared of me coz of my scary face. He thought I am ugly but beautiful from inside. Silly humans either way..haha

Helmond died on Friday the 13^th, my auspicious day

Nobody could hear my cry, coz ghosts can never cry, they can scream only and that too is inaudible to these useless humans

If I can’t cry, how my heart could, moreover I never had a heart.

                                                                 

                                                                 ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

Thanks for reading my story.

Don’t you think it should be in Guniess book of world records to be the first ghost’s love story by a ghost itself?

Anyways, sincere thanks to my papa Dracula, he helped me a lot in making this novel. And if you think it is a very short novel then let me tell you, useless humans, that we ghosts never fall in love even for a second. So being in love for two months and writing about it was like living a decade in a second, for me. And one more thing I hate that Edward Cullen, he is the rebel in our society to fall in love with a bitch. And you humans make film on it. Bitches you are, real bitches. Save yourself from my wrath!!

Sincerely,

R.I.P. Natalie 

                                                              

**Love Sex aur Dhoka**

This time I will talk about love (like I always talk about other intelligent things in life). And definitely this love is not the love of parents and siblings (if you know me well, then you won’t even expect that from me). Love is like an ocean which never dries up, and problems like global warming only increases it or love is like a Rubik’s cube, there are countless numbers of wrong twist and turns, but when you get it right, it looks perfect no matter what way you look at it (Aah! Stop praising my English. Both of these are stolen from someone’s inbox and facebook status). Love is like a glass, grass or brass or any xyz thing according to those boring SMSes which we delete without reading. For some it is divine, for some it is a hormonal imbalance, for some it is all about sex and for some it is simply LOVE. Well I am not here to tell you what this love thing is all about but I just wanted to share something about love, something which I think and experience, something which I have seen other’s thinking and experiencing.

So, let’s have a look on some shortest love stories by some *somebody*, and see what your take on love is.

“I loved her. But it was one sided. She did not know about that. Now I love #$%*!? And there is nothing wrong in this. I can’t become Devdas for somebody. She is my 4^th love and even she does not know.*blush*”. – Somebody

“I loved her. She knew about that but she was committed and she told me this thing very late, I thought she would start feeling the same for me and it kept me happy but it was impossible. Now I don’t want to talk to her. Himmat nai hoti *silence*”. – Somebody

“I love her till she loves me; I am not a person to fall in love. I just respect her commitment *proud*”. – Somebody

“I love you. You do not understand. I know you. You are a type of girl who once gets committed then will never break it. You are a girl of character. Why don’t you understand? Do you have a boyfriend? I know you love me. Don’t cha? *frustration*”. – Somebody

“I love him. He is my best friend. I can’t tell him the same. Moreover there is no future. But yea I know I truly love him *sad*”. –Somebody

“I think I love him. I am not sure. He might be my crush, and it will end up as soon as I start talking to somebody else. But right now I think about him and I love doing so. I am not in a relationship. It is just a feeling I am not betraying anybody. And I am happy that this boy helped me to know that I was never in love, they were just my crush *smile*”. – Somebody

“I loved him. I always thought about him, no matter what I did. He looks like shit. But he aspires for a beautiful girl. And later I got to know that he is not the right person and now I don’t talk to him and try not to think about him *confused*”. – Somebody

Well, moving now to the next segment of the blog and the last segment of love i.e. sex. It is the most famous topic no doubt (that is why I have chosen it this time). It might have made you saying “hawww” or raising your eyebrows till now. But I bet you have stopped yawning. Yea, very blatantly I am going to share few bold statements by some *somebody*.

“If a girl has a boyfriend and she is saying that she is a virgin then she is lying *proud*”. – Somebody

“No no I have never got physical even in my mind with the girl I love. But yea I have thought such things with other beautiful girls *laugh*”. – Somebody

“It is obvious to get physical with your crush in the mind, and there is no wrong in this, you won’t get pregnant and everybody does so. You always want to at least kiss the person you love *laugh*”. – Somebody

“Yea I got physical with him in the mind of course *giggles*”. – Somebody

“Love is just a system for getting someone to call you darling after sex”- Somebody

I personally think love is not something to be categorized as pure or impure. You are surely not looking for ghee or something. It is about trueness. There is nothing like untrue love exists for if it is untrue then it is not love. True love never demands, neither sex nor money, it just knows love.

Now the last segment of my blog is dhoka (betrayal), it usually happens along with or after love and sex. For some it is result of circumstances for some it is simply dhoka. Few lucky people marry their love, and a very few survives it. So now *light, camera, action* on dhoka.

“I loved that bitch, but I am not a fool to get fooled after knowing everything, she does everything with everybody, I am feeling free after leaving her *sighs*”. – Somebody

“She loves to be admired. If she is in a relationship then why the hell she talks to someone else? And that too she exchanges love related scraps etc with the other boy. I am leaving her *anger*”. – Somebody

“I loved him a lot. He always wanted to get physical. I never allowed. I just kissed him. But he is now enjoying with some other girl and making me fool. I can’t forgive him. But I can’t even forget him *sob*”. – Somebody

“Of course I am single. Who said I am committed? I am free like you, her or anybody else present here. It is just for fun. Come close I will tell you a secret he is my 15^th boyfriend *laugh*”. – Somebody

“Yea I am not single. I am tringle *laugh* I have three boyfriends. All of them are lallu. They are rich and spend money on me. They are just slave of my beauty. I feel guilty sometimes but everything is fair in fashion world *sighs*”. – Somebody

Well, that is love, sex and dhoka for you. You might be in love or were in love or want to fall in love. But always remember commitment is a very big task. Give yourself time, because life is one. Don’t make a partner because you need one; make one because you love him/her.

Let love blossom

Let it fly

Express it here

Don’t feel shy.

(Sorry! I can’t help myself rhyming. Please tolerate as you have done till now)

**CAUTION : be careful while falling in love in India**

How would you like your better half to be? Fair, handsome, beautiful, intelligent, a good human being or a Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Sikh and if you are in India and a Hindu too, then what would you look for? yes, the answer to this big question (in India, it’s a big one) is Rajpoot, Brahmin, Yadav etc, and little fortunately  if you are from a more liberal society then you may look for broader terms like Punjabi, Bihari, South Indian, Assamesse etc. if u still have not got me then  let me reintroduce you to the well known condition of our very own Indian marriages, apart from the fact that they are considered to be the longest lived marriages on the earth (well, I know it itself is very surprising), they are the most hard to achieve marriages too, as the parents of the boy or the girl not only look for the handsome looking and handsome earning in laws but also the religion should be same, caste should be same, "gotra" (the people who are descendants in an unbroken male line from a common male ancestor) should be different, and all these things have so deeply enrooted in our culture that even a slight violation of all these leads to cold blooded crime like honor killing or social exclusion. The so called “guardian” of Indian culture that is khap panchayat announces sometimes funny, many a times heartbreaking laws and punishments for the rebellious love birds, as they have committed the biggest social crime of falling in love. It is a sad thing to come up with when you live in a country like India, where you can extract the great examples from epic love of Radha-krishna to fictional love of Devdas-paro.  Well coming back to the criteria, yes, when all these criteria is fulfilled then start looking up for the amount of money, the girl's side can give to the boy's side and this famous marketing is known as 'dowry'. If u have bought a good-to-show son in law for yourself in nice amount then it is fine and your daughter might get a good life in return and if not, then she could be killed by burning or giving poison (choice is totally with her in laws). Lastly, if you have qualified all these criteria, then welcome to the grand Indian wedding, where communities, castes, religions, society and money are more important than the boy and the girl and most important their love. So next time you are in India, and by mistake member of a middle class family then fall in love but before that don't forget to ask your love interest "you are what?"

 

** Beauty VS Boys VS Love VS Girls **

(Before you start reading this blog, my apologies to all boys, girls, and novelists. This is the another crappy and directionless blog by me. Go through it, and see if you could get anything.)

Aren’t you guys bored of reading about girls and women centric write ups? Every 3^rd novel or love story has a white cheek with essentially pink lips and kohl black eyes, hair must be cloudy black, nose has to be pin pointed and figure should be a perfect 36-24-36, as if girls like us either don’t exist or have just came from the huge “Jupiter”.

Beauty of women has always been over-explained and exaggerated. Maybe it is because guys always dream of such beauties as their girl, no matter what they get in the end. And girls don’t go for looks much, they go for a heart which can show maximum amount of love irrespective of how much love that heart does in actual.

Ok! Leave these philosophies even I have started yawning.

Well, being a straight and a student in girl’s College, I think no one else can understand the importance of boys more than me. In my words boys are those beautiful creation of God who alone can make a girl feel more beautiful.

My heart turns a poetaster whenever I think of boys.

They are good, they are shrewd

They are cool, they are fool

They are handsome, they are lame

They are pride, they are shame!!

(OMG! My rhyme isn’t that bad.)

Oops! Sorry, where were we? Yea boys, boys are of different types unlike girls. All girls are same indeed, coz at last all they need is a big loving foolish heart, but boys no matter how they are, their girls should be 1.Beautiful & virgin 2.Beautiful & smart 3.beautiful & sexy 4.beautiful & strong character 5.beautiful & intelligent 6.beautiful & & &…yea more beautiful

The fat, white and intelligent Hari of 5 POINT SOMEONE had a sexy girlfriend Neha, who later turned into Krish of 2 STATES and ended up marrying the another sexy Anusha

I hate this sex discrimination done to boys in novels. I mean you describe the bandhez suit wore by the girl, forget the suit you even tell the girl had wore her lingerie or not, but what about our dear boys, aren’t they a human being or they don’t wear an underwear?

This is really injustice; boys should get equal pages on beauty description as girls.

Moving further to movies, we have all type of item girls from badnaam Munni to jawaan Sheila, where are my dear boys? My badnaam Munna and jawaan shailesh . Boys are enough beautiful, you girls don’t try to underestimate them,

Those grown beards

Those long hairs

Those broad biceps

But still nobody cares!!

How sad!! Oh boys don’t lose heart start watching mirror and then look for girls, then you will come to know every girl is beautiful in her own way.

Lastly, I would like to tell

Boys reject faces, girls reject hearts.

See, girls are still harsher.

I told you, boys rockkkkkkkkk..\m/ \m/

Thanks for reading this, and what??? Looking for sorry??

Oh c’mon this is my blog I will write what I want to write.

Now, don’t give the scowl look, remove the eye ball now!!

**RISHIJA SINGH TiNg TiNg TiDiNgGgGg**

HELLO! HI! SAT SRI AKAL!

My name is singh,RISHIJA SINGH and yup you guessed it right,I am not a terrorist ,I am a girl and yup a girl that’s it with no extra qualities nothing

I am not so beautiful,not so intelligent actually not at all intelligent,and I screw up every third thing I do in my life.unfortunately I am a blogger and more unfortunately this is my third blog,so it has to be screwed up anyway

So I decided to write about my life till now in very brief

Take a deep breath,keep your hands on the chest and now tolerate it

I was born on 24^th December 199? (oh c’mon you are looking for year,forget,I am a girl I told you)

Till class 6,i had no ambitions the only thing I dreamt of was to marry a handsome boy with handsome salary and having handsome children.but after reaching 7^th I started taking tuitions and became really good at maths,and then like everybody the only thing I dreamt of was becoming an IITian.well I was an IITian till my 10^th ofcourse,in my dreams.after 10^th,I went outside my hometown and joined coaching like every third IIT aspirant and then there I did a lot of hard work for the first time,yea I did believe me..

1^st crush,1^st beer,1^st day 1^st show,1^st mobile phone,1^st orkut account.and all these firsts led to my last ranks in the class.i screwed my 2 years and then went back to my home.

Gave boards,gave entrance

Passed boards,failed entrance

Then I decided to change my stream,I did it and chose journalism,luckily I passed the entrance.well right now I am a hopeless journalism student and hope to remain that in future also.

But looking at my condition I think I will end up with my very 1^st dream only.

When I am in the class,I feel like I am the only tabloid writer among "the guardian’s" writers

And when I am at my hostel I always wonder “is there something else in the world apart from facebook?”

And my mind replies “yes there are you- tube,orkut,twitter….”

MISSION SUCCESSFUL

Yipppppppppppiee

I think I have bored you guys enough.my uselessness has no end but this blog must end now before you guys start posting slangs in the comments.

Take care for now

And I know…I suck!!!!!!

**NO COUNTRY FOR WOMAN**

I am a poor black nubile
burden of my parents head
on monday the boy saw me for a while
i was shying and was getting red

he saw me,we talked and then he was gone
on tuesday,i was rejected said the phone
i was feeling dejected and alone
but on wednesday,again i was shown

i am the same poor black nubile
burden of my parents head
he too saw me,we talked for a while
but 'no' yes a 'no' was all he said

days then months then years passed
but all i heared was a big 'no'
i believed marriage is in god's hand
but now i think its a one man show

that fortunate day also came
when i turned into a married woman
i thought all my dreams came true
but no marriage is not everything you do

one night he came half drunk
punched,kicked and dragged me
i was so hurt and i couldn't even stand
all i was paying off for my being "she"

the next day my in laws were beating me
reason was nothing but the less dowry
i was so hurt and i couldn't even stand
then i got to know there is no woman's land....:(:(

**DELHI through my EYES**

Its the 1st time,as you can see,i am writing on my blog,so am really excited and clueless at the same time,that on what topic should i write on..so i've decided to write on what i feel,what are my views,what are my experiences of DELHI being an outsider
DELHI, captures a small area on the map of INDIA,much smaller than BIHAR(my hometown),but when i first visited this place in 2008,i was surprised by its hugeness and crowd,seemed like delhi has people from every part of india as well as world,obviously coz of tourists and migrants..it was such a colourful experience for me..and the most amazing part was my journey in the metro..i was so impressed by this invention..which alone makes DELHI a metropolitan city..it was my 2 days visit of this place..everything appeared so beautiful to me.
well i never thought of living at this place alone,but,you never know,after 2 years,i managed to get admission here in a renowned university,and since then life has become a roller coster ride,each day comes like its my 1st day on the earth,with new experiences,sometimes good another times bad..
life is not all about "roti,kapda or makan"  here its about "pizza,gaadi or brand" and i'll surely like to mention 1 of my favourite dialogue from the movie NO 1 KILLED JESSICA "here nobody is anybody,here everybody is somebody".how true the words are.everybody seems so powerful here that you'll feel so small..no matter how small or confined the mentality is gaadi badi honi chahiye..i always wonder why a place with metro facility needs so much of cars???
further,night life in DELHI is also not about "feeling sleepy" its about "feeling drowsy",it alone shows that the city never sleeps..everybody is in so much hurry,everybody has to reach somewhere,everybody has to get something,and yea again i would like to mention this everybody is not anybody its somebody..mind it :)..
only delhi alone produces so much of news that you won't get time to read about the rest of the world,this is also i find a reason why people here are so self centered.one thing which i have noticed while reading the newspaper apart from scams,the news of rape cases,it has become the part and parcel of newspaper.almost everyday you can read a new rape case,forget the ages of victims,even the accused comes out to be under 18,which is really very disheartening.it shows how the morals and characters of children is deteriorating.parents think by enrolling their child in the best schools they have done their job,and it can alone make their child,the best.which is unfortunately their misbelief

it is really sad that such a beautiful city faces such harsh and dark realities..and its hard to say that whether DELHI should cry on such sad facts or should be happy on its blind growth..
whatever its my time to pause and your time to rethink...
is it really "kaat kaleja dilli...mera kaat kaleja dilli le gayi......"?????????????